Harry&Ginny Drabble
by elanev91
Summary: This will be like the format for Jily Drabble! Some stories are interconnected, some stand alone. Some are canon(esque) and some are AU. Some occur during the course of the series, some are after Hogwarts. Not every chapter here deserves the M rating but some definitely will, so be warned!
1. Chapter 1

**Hello readers! So I promised a chapter over in Jily Drabble (working on it) but I've just started re-reading the series again and I've started thinking more about Harry/Ginny stuff and this sort of popped into my mind. SO… I've created a Drabble story for them! I'm not sure what their celeb couple name is though. Garry? Hinny? Hanny? Girry? None of those really work for me. (If you know what it is, please tell me so I can stop looking stupid).**

 **As always… I am not JKR. Therefore, I own nothing.**

* * *

At least it's not too cold out here... the last couple of nights have been absolutely _bitter_ and it made sitting watch a complete nightmare. The breeze, too, had disappeared, so it was just me, the dark sky, and the still forest. It felt like we were the only things in the entire universe. It almost reminded me of the night in the forbidden forest all those years ago... except this time I wasn't battling against the fear that something was probably going to jump out of the trees and try to kill and/or eat me.

Merlin, I missed Hogwarts. I knew that it wasn't the school I'd left, not the place I'd come to think of as home... but I couldn't help think about it sometimes. The feasts alone would have been wonderful right now... but above all, I missed Ginny.

I don't think I will _ever_ be able to tell Ginny how much I miss her. Not because I don't want to, but because there would never be the right words to explain the constant ache in my stomach. I didn't just miss her, I craved her… I needed her presence, to feel her hands on my skin, to taste her. I needed to wrap my arms around her, to have her hold me tightly and tell me that everything was going to be okay.

But I couldn't have any of those things… so I did the next best thing.

I'd gotten into the habit, on these quiet nights when I was sitting watch, of sitting with the Marauder's Map and watching Ginny's dot move through the castle. Maybe Hermione suspected that I was doing it, but I don't think she knew. She probably would have brought it up if she did. There was something nice about being able to indulge in this habit of mine. I felt closer to Ginny even when I was miles away from her… even when I was on a mission that she knew nothing about.

Tonight, Ginny was up in Gryffindor tower, sitting in the common room with Neville. They'd been spending a lot of time together lately…

I groaned and flopped back against the tree behind me, ruffling my hair in frustration. I didn't want to be jealous of Neville… he and Ginny were just friends after all. But it was hard not to be at least a little jealous. He understood what she was going through right now, he was there to help her through it all. I couldn't even write her a bloody letter to tell her that I hadn't stopped thinking about her since the wedding, that I loved her more than I could even begin to articulate, that, even though I wasn't there, I spent every night wishing that she was alright.

I folded the map out beside me and grabbed a spare jumper I'd brought out from the tent. I balled it up and laid down, shoving the jumper underneath my head. As utterly terrifying as this journey was, I did enjoy the small moments like this. Laying out here, in the chill of the winter air, staring up at the clear, black sky, I almost forgot that there was a war… that Voldemort existed… that I was responsible for killing him. I almost forgot who I was, almost forgot the fact that nearly everyone I loved was dead because of this war. Almost.

And then my scar would prickle again or Hermione would come yawning out of the tent and I would come crashing back into the reality of my life.

Things had been even worse since Ron left. Hermione and I, obviously, got on well but there was that gap in the air between us that neither one of us wanted to acknowledge. I found that I wasn't laughing nearly as much as I used to, that Hermione wasn't nearly as talkative as she normally was. Without Ron, we both sort of shut down… just going through the motions of the journey we knew we had to take. But at least we were still working towards our goal. I guess.

I felt that same gap whenever I thought about Ginny. She was always there, dancing around the fringes of my mind, waiting until I could give her the attention that she so deserved. During the day, I felt her absence like a dull ache in my chest, a slight pain in my heart that I couldn't quite shake. As soon as all was quiet and I could let me mind wander, she found her way back in. And then I would think about our first kiss, that reckless kiss in Gryffindor Tower that could have gone horribly wrong. I'd think about those trysts by the lake, in the shade of the tree that soon became our favourite. I thought about the way the soft skin of her stomach felt under my trembling fingertips as they eased their way under her shirt. I could almost hear the soft gasp that fell from her lips the first time we'd dared to explore concealed skin, could nearly feel the way her stomach muscles had quivered with desire before she'd pushed me onto my back and climbed on top of me. I remembered the time she'd found me after our morning classes and dragged me into an abandoned classroom to spend our break… the way she had no qualms about pushing me up against the wall and pressing her hips against mine while snaking her hands up the front of my shirt. I love that she isn't afraid to go after what she wants. Even more, I love that she wants me.

I rolled over onto my side and looked at the map again. Ginny was upstairs in her dormitory now and I hoped that she was going to be able to sleep tonight. I traced my finger over her dot and smiled a sad smile, "I love you, Gin." I'd barely whispered it but I felt myself hoping that she'd heard it… even though I knew it was impossible.

Just then, the tent rustled behind me and I sat up, quickly folding the map and stuffing it back into my pocket. My gaze met Hermione's tired eyes and she smiled a small smile – "My turn," I nodded and stood up and watched as she took my place against the tree. I started to walk back towards the tent when Hermione spoke again, "She knows, Harry." I turned around and caught Hermione's eye and raised my eyebrow. "She knows you love her." Hermione smiled and I laughed quietly, walked back towards her and sat down, "I take it you heard me?" Hermione nodded but, for once, the smile didn't immediately fade from her face, "You really hurt her when you decided to break up with her last June… but she knew it was for the best. And she's forgiven you for it." I sighed, "And she loves you too." Hermione leaned back against the tree and I smiled, "I hope that's true…" Hermione just rolled her eyes and I couldn't contain the laugh that escaped.

"What?" She asked, raising her eyebrows. "It's just that," I said, still fighting laughter, "you haven't properly rolled your eyes since…" I broke off abruptly and Hermione's smile fell from her face. We sat there quietly for a few moments before I looked at her again, "You must know he loves you, Hermione." She looked up at me with tears in her eyes, "I'm not holding out hope for that anymore, Harry." I slung my arm over her shoulder and pulled her into my side. "Well, I'm holding out hope for you," I said, rubbing the top of her arm. "Ron won't be a prat forever. You know how he gets sometimes." Hermione laughed and I felt her ribs vibrating against mine. It had been a while since either of us had eaten a proper meal. "Oh, I know," she said, reaching up to wipe her eyes. We sat there in silence for a while just staring out into the quiet forest before Hermione spoke again, "Look at us… desperately in love with two of the Weasleys. Who would have imagined?" I laughed, "I never would have imagined it… but they're just what we need." Hermione smiled and rested her head against my shoulder.

We fell asleep against the tree that night. When the sun came up a few hours later, Hermione stirred against my side and I woke up. I caught her eye and she just sighed, "Well, that was a pretty ineffective watch." She stood up and stretched and I followed suit. She went to walk back into the tent but I grabbed her hand and pulled her into a hug. "Thanks for being a brilliant friend, Hermione." She hugged me back before pulling away. "I could say the same to you, Harry." She smiled and dropped my hand, "Fancy a cup of a tea?" I nodded and we walked into the tent together, determined to face another day… fighting for the ones we love.

* * *

 **So, there's going to be more to this but I'm not sure when I'll be inspired to write more of this pairing... I'm sure that I will though as, like I said, I'm re-reading! (Also, you should re-read. It's SUCH an amazing experience!) Let me know what you think and, if you have a scene you've been dying to see (or whatever :D) just let me know! Cheers!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hello again! I'm trying to re-inspire myself and spent some time re-reading my Jily this morning… I promise I'll get that visit back to uni-Jily up soon. I think I finally have something… it just needs to brew for a little while longer. In the meantime, I've managed to think of two chapters for this collection so enjoy! (The second chapter will be up shortly! Just a few last minute adjustments!)**

 **As always… I am not JKR. Therefore, I own nothing.**

* * *

The first time I got drunk, I took it a little too far. I don't remember much from that night. Fred was always a gaping hole when we all went out together, the shadow that hung over all our heads and sat just beneath each joke George told, each happy memory we recalled. My seventeenth birthday, just three months after the war ended, was a more somber affair than I think anyone wanted it to be… so Harry, my brothers, Hermione, and Angelina decided to take me out to a Muggle pub they'd heard about. We were desperate to forget, dying to move on, and the year after the war found us in a lot of Muggle shops and restaurants in an attempt to escape a wizarding community that was still trying to come to terms with what happened. We weren't ready for that… so we hid.

The pub was nice and being away from the wizarding world was even better. I didn't have to avoid the curious stares, accept the unwanted handshakes of people who wanted to thank me for fighting in the Battle or for standing up for their children during our time at Hogwarts that year… I could just sit in this booth with the people I loved and pretend nothing had ever happened.

I remember the first round of drinks, the six of us clinking our glasses together and laughing as beer sloshed out onto the table. The drinks, jokes, and chat eventually all blended together… and that's where my memory stopped.

I woke up the next morning, back in my bed at the Burrow wrapped in Harry's arms… but I was panicked. I couldn't remember anything from the night before – everything after the first round had faded from my memory and I had no idea how I'd spent my time or where I'd been.

My throat felt like it was closing up and I started gasping for breath. I reached over and shook Harry awake, "Harry! Harry! What happened last night?! I was with you all night right?!" Harry's eyes had barely opened when he noticed the terror etched on my face. He sat up immediately and wrapped me in his arms. "Ginny," he started smoothing my hair and placing soft kisses on my face, "what's wrong?" "I thought…" I sighed and buried my face in his neck. I took a few steadying breaths before pulling back and looking at him.

"It just felt like first year… and when I used to wake up and find myself places and have no memory of how I got there. And I know that it's stupid because obviously Voldemort can't be possessing me anymore, but when I woke up this morning and couldn't remember how I got home or how you ended up in my bed because I know Ron would have been weird about it if he'd seen because you know how he is even though we both know that he's up there with Hermione right now," Harry groaned and I stopped mid-ramble, "Gin, I don't need that image in my mind, thank you." I laughed and sighed, "I don't need it either but I'm just saying…." I trailed off and let my eyes sink down to the bed, ashamed of how stupid I was making myself sound already this morning. "Ginny… there is nothing to be ashamed about here." Harry put his hand on my cheek and tilted my head up so I was looking at him again. He was smiling his brilliant, crooked smile when his eyes met mine. "But most importantly," he rubbed his thumb reassuringly against my cheek, "there's nothing to be afraid of anymore." I nodded and laid back down on the bed, pulling Harry with me and rolling over to rest my head on his chest.

"Would you mind telling me what happened though? I don't like having gaps in my memory…" Harry hummed in agreement and spent the next hour recounting all our adventures from the night before.

* * *

Sometimes, late at night, I can swear that I hear him.

The whisper of the summer wind blowing through our curtains tonight reminds me of the way that his high, hoarse voice filled the walls of Hogwarts that night. I feel my entire body tense, wriggle my way out of Harry's arms, and slam the window shut, desperate to block out the memories that are flooding uncontrollably into my mind.

I can feel my hands trembling as I crawl back into bed, and Harry stirs as I slide back underneath the blankets. I curl up onto my side and squeeze my eyes shut – _breathe… one… two… three…_

Harry stirs again and I hear him groan softly, his hands moving through the blankets trying to find me. I roll over to face him and find his shining, emerald eyes staring at me. "Are you okay?" His voice is scratchy from sleep but his eyes are alert and his arms are tensed. I sigh and try to keep the shaking out of my voice, "The wind sounded like him…" I drop my gaze but Harry runs his hand against my cheek and draws my face back up to his. "It's okay to be scared, Gin," he pulls me up against his chest and smooths back my hair and begins peppering kisses over my face. "We're safe, Ginny. _I promise."_

I nod, "I know… I just can't help but remember all the things that happened that night and everything that we went through for _years_ before that… I'm okay most of the time but sometimes I hear something or see something and all of a sudden I feel like someone threw a time turner on me and just spun the dial… I forget that you're okay, forget that my brother is dead, forget that Voldemort is gone and that my family and friends are finally safe… I forget that I'm not being _tortured_ by those _fucking nutters_ at Hogwarts, that I'm not sure whether or not I even have a future… and I know that it doesn't make any sense and that I should just get over it and I am… for the most part… but I don't know how to make it all stop." My entire body is shaking.

Harry tightens his grip around my waist and buries his face in my hair – "I think about it too… Remember the other night when your practice ran late?" I nod. "I was sitting at the table reading through some files and I heard something scratching upstairs. I know _now_ that it was the branches of our tree scratching against the window… But at the time I grabbed my wand and started performing all kinds of protective charms before I realized what was going on. I'd just finished reversing them when you got home." I trail my fingers up and down his spine as he talks and he pulls away just a bit to look at me. "We both have a lot of healing to do, Gin," I sigh angrily, "But it's been _two years,_ Harry. Two fucking years! Why is _he_ still able to do this to me?!"

"We overcame things that most people never have to even think about Ginny…" I huff, but don't say anything else when I see him raise his eyebrows at me, "We had to be so strong for so long and… now that we have time to slow down, we are finally absorbing all the things that happened to us. It's going to take some time…" I crack a smile, "When did you get so insightful, Mr. Potter?" Harry smiles and starts tracing his fingers along my ribs, "We had an Auror training module last week about dealing with the aftermath of the war. We've been rounding up people who were working with the Death Eaters and a lot of us were having a difficult time… so they thought it might help."

"Did it?" I ask, raising my eyes to his. "I think so…" he smiles a small smile down at me, "but it's still going to take some time to really get through everything." "Well, it's a good thing we're in this together, then." I pull myself up and place a kiss on his lips before snuggling back into his chest and closing my eyes.

* * *

The first Christmas after the war, Ron, Harry, and George decided that we needed to have a family quidditch match. It was freezing cold and snowing hard, but despite how much Hermione and Fleur protested, we were all set up on brooms and flying around the hills surrounding the burrow before long. It had been a long while since most of them had been up on brooms, especially since Harry and Ron had started work with the ministry in September instead of going back to Hogwarts like Hermione and I.

Quidditch had become my release in the few months that had passed after the war. I'd been up on my broom all summer, playing for hours of end while Harry and Ron bewitched quaffles for me and poured over their Auror training manuals. I would often catch them staring up at me, their desire to play obvious… but there were serious about their training and they studied diligently… for probably the first time in their lives without Hermione incessantly riding them.

I was playing faster, harder, and more intensely than ever before – I was relentless with the quaffle and I refused to take any nonsense on the pitch. And I now had an offer letter from the Holyhead Harpies to show for all my efforts. The ability to live the future that I have always wanted was… the most amazing feeling in the world. Especially coming off years of such extreme uncertainty… and the looming possibility that I might not actually survive the war. Like so many others…

Here, though, playing with my family, I had to take it a little easy on them. But I guess I'm not as good as slowing down as I thought. "Bloody hell, Gin!" George wiped a sheen of sweat off his forehead as he dodged me on my way to my fifth goal in as many minutes. I turned around on my broom and laughed – "I can't help that you bastards have stopped playing!" George rolled his eyes, "You're a professional player now, Gin! It's not like we just have stopped practicing." I laughed, "Well, I should probably go help Mum anyway. I don't want her sitting alone today." George nodded and flew over to give me a high five, "You're going to kick their arses when you start playing for the Harpies, Gin." I grinned, "I'll do my best." I flew over to Harry and gave him a swift kiss. "Give them hell, love." Harry winked, "You know I will." I planted one more kiss on his lips (to the hoots and shouts of George and Ron now) and flew back towards the Burrow and landed in the front garden.

I stowed my broom in the shed in the garden, kicked my trainers off outside the door, and walked inside. I pulled my hair down out of my ponytail and shook it out while walking to the kitchen. "Need any help Mum?" Mum was sitting at the table, a cup of tea in her hands and a lost look on her face. "Mum?" She suddenly looked up and her eyes found mine – "Oh, hi, darling. I didn't hear you come in." "Mum, are you alright?" I sat down across from her and reached out to take hold of her hand. "I knew today was going to be difficult," Mum took a sip of tea with her free hand, "but there are moments where I feel like I'm going to fall apart at the seams." I let go of her hand and got up to sit beside her. I pulled Mum in for a hug and just sighed, "I think we all feel the same way, Mum. And we're not going to let you fall apart." I said. "I know, but I don't want to be a drag on you kids either. You all have your own lives to live and even your father has been busier at the Ministry with his new position and helping everyone rebuild… I just don't want to be a burden."

"Mum," I squeezed her even tighter, "you could _never_ be a burden. It's going to take some time for us to all move past what happened… but we will _never_ see you as a burden and we wouldn't _ever_ abandon you. None of us can deal with this on our own. We need each other." Mum reached up and wiped tears out of her eyes, "I know, I just don't know how I'm ever going to get over this. One of my babies is gone because I couldn't protect him." The tears were rolling down her cheeks now. "Moving on doesn't mean forgetting, Mum. Fred would want us all to be happy. He wouldn't want us to sit around and wallow… he started a joke shop in the middle of a war for Merlin's sake!" Mum smiled and continued to wipe tears off her cheeks. "And you didn't fail him, Mum. You raised seven strong, clever, brave children who aren't afraid to fight for what they believe in, no matter what the cost. Fred was one of the strongest of us all and he was prepared to give everything to fight in that war. You were the best mum Fred, or any of us, could have asked for. And we're here for you… all of us. Harry and Hermione included." Mum smiled, "Well, those two were always part of the family." I laughed, "Because Merlin knows our family wasn't big enough to begin with." Mum chuckled and I felt my heart warm to the sound. I hadn't really heard her laugh in so long.

Some time later, after every last bit of food had been eaten (most of it by Ron) and every cracker popped, I wandered outside and sat down under the tree in the back garden. It wasn't snowing anymore, but the air was crisp and cold… I found that I didn't mind. I stared up at the sky and sighed. Mum was right… today was a difficult day. Being back at home was something of a relief, especially since being at Hogwarts was still a daily struggle. But home was also filled with memories of Fred… I reached into my pocket and pulled out Fred's hand from the clock. It had fallen off the day… well, the day it happened. Everyone had avoided looking at the clock for weeks, but I was curious – I had to know what happened to it. When I saw it lying on the floor just underneath the clock I couldn't just let it lie there. I'd carried it with me ever since.

"Mind if I join you?" I looked up and found Harry smiling down at me with two mugs in his hands. "Of course," I said, smiling and scooting over to give him some room on the tree trunk. He sat down and handed me a mug of hot chocolate, "I thought you might need this. It's pretty cold out tonight." I grinned and took a sip.

"I miss him so much," Harry said, staring out at the fields behind the Burrow. "Everything just seems… quieter without him around. And you can tell that George is just barely keeping it together." I didn't say anything but silently agreed. "Angelina helps, I think. I'm glad George has her to rely on… and I'm sure her help in the shop is appreciated too." I took another sip of my hot chocolate and stared at my hands. How could I express the deep, never-ending loss that filled my heart whenever I thought of Fred?

"I'm seeing Teddy tomorrow," Harry said suddenly, turning to me with a smile. "I sent some gifts from Father Christmas today, but I think Uncle Harry owes him a visit." "Could I go with you?" Harry grinned, "Of course. You know how much Teddy loves his Aunt Ginny." I laughed, "He only loves me because I fly him around on my broom." Harry smirked, "Well, he's going to be a star quidditch player one day… the practice is good for him." I rolled my eyes and we sat quietly for a few moments and sipped at our drinks.

"How are you okay, Harry?"

He turned and looked at me with a questioning look in his eyes. "I mean," I said, "after everything that's happened to you… how have you managed to keep it together and move on with your life?" Harry nodded and thought for a moment. "I don't have a choice," he began, taking a final pull from his mug and setting it down behind him. "There are days, of course, when I don't want to get out of bed. I still dream about my parents, Cedric, Sirius, Fred, Remus, Tonks, Dumbledore, Snape… everyone. I've seen them in my dreams more times than I even care to think about right now." "I'm sorry, Harry, I didn't mean – " "No, it's okay, Gin. We need to be able to talk about this stuff or we're never going to deal with any of it. And we need to be able to talk about it together because we won't be able to build the trusting relationship we need otherwise."

"I'd be lying," he said, scooting closer to me so that our thighs were touching, "if I said I don't think about how different my life could be. What it would have been like if I wasn't the _Chosen One_ … I don't even remember what it was like to have my parents around. I can hear my mother's screams and see the green light that killed her… but I don't remember anything about how happy we must have been before then. I have no memory of what we used to do, of them reading stories to me… anything. And growing up with the Durselys was a far cry from what anyone's childhood should have been… but when I hear about how much my parents loved me, or find pictures of them with me as a baby it hurts even more. My childhood was ripped away from me before I even had the chance to form any substantial memories of it. And so I spent my childhood thinking my parents died in a car crash and the Dursleys never talked about them. I had no clue who I was, who my parents were, what they'd died for… I just knew that I was living with a family that thought I was a burden and spared no chance to tell me so." Harry fell silent and I moved even closer against him, took his hand.

"In my first year at Hogwarts I found the mirror of Erised… did I ever tell you this?" "No," I whispered. "Well, I found it one night while I was running away from Filch under the invisibility cloak," Harry chuckled and I smiled, "I walked into a random classroom to wait for him to go to another part of the castle and found the mirror. As soon as I walked in front of it I saw my entire family… and my mum and dad were right at the front." I felt tears forming in my eyes and I squeezed Harry's hand. "It was the first time I'd ever seen them in my entire life. I never knew how much I really looked like my father… how much my eyes resembled my mother's. The Dursleys had never told me any of this… And I felt the deepest, most painful ache I've ever felt in my life. They were so close to me, in that mirror, but I couldn't get to them, no matter how much I wanted to. And I _desperately_ wanted to." Harry wiped a tear off his cheek and grasped my hand even tighter, "When I met Sirius and Remus in third year and found out that they were my dad's closest friends, I felt I'd been given another chance at staying connected to them. They both told me story after story about my parents, about my short relationship with them… how much they loved me," Harry's voice broke and I noticed that tears were rolling down my cheeks now.

"I finally had someone outside Hogwarts to write to." Harry laughed and wiped tears off his face, "I know that sounds stupid but it felt like I was… grounded, you know? Like I had people who cared about what happened to me. It was difficult, hearing about my parents, but I thrived on those stories. I needed them more than I ever realized. And when Sirius… it was like losing my parents all over again. My stepfather was gone… and despite everything else I'd gone through it was like being marooned on an island all over again. I felt totally, utterly alone. And then, of course, the war happened… and then people I loved were dying left and right and… at a certain point I just shut down my brain and went through the motions."

"And now... with Remus and Tonks gone, I can't help but think about Teddy. He is going to have to live with the same ache I've lived with my entire life. Missing your parents, or anyone you really love that much... it never goes away. It just festers underneath your skin, waiting to surface. I just hope that I can make Teddy's childhood better than mine, that I can make it the best childhood he could possibly have. His parents might be gone but I don't want him to spend a single moment wondering whether he's loved." I laid my head on Harry's shoulder then and we sat quietly for what felt like an eternity.

"But I also know," Harry continued, "how lucky I am." I pulled back and raised my eyebrows at him. Harry just smiled, "I met Ron on the platform first year and I managed to find a family that loved and cared for me as much as any biological family would. You guys have always, _always_ made me feel like I was safe and wanted and loved… and I don't know where I would be without you. I had the chance to know Sirius, Remus, Fred, Tonks… to hear about my parents, to laugh, to have relationships with some of the most amazing people I will ever know. That doesn't mean I wouldn't change a few things if I had the chance," Harry said with a small smile, "But I know that I can't live my life wishing I could change everything. I've lost a lot of people... and that loss will never leave me. There will be times when I think about them and desperately miss them. But Ginny," Harry turned then and grasped both my hands, "I know how lucky I am to know your family. How astoundingly lucky I am to have you. You make me so, _so_ happy Ginny… and I know that, with you, I'll be alright. We'll overcome this." Harry wrapped me in a hug and I melted into his embrace.

* * *

I was sitting in the dim light of the kitchen in the middle of the night for the third night in a row. My tea things were scattered all about the table, spare bits of parchment and bottles of different inks were spread out in front of me as I poured over the new playbook we'd been handed this week. "Memorize it before Friday's practice," Gwenog had said. I could if this stupid thing didn't contain so many bloody pages… _why don't I have Hermione's brain?_

I picked up my teacup and took a long drag.

"SIRIUS!" Harry's scream ripped through the silent house and I dropped my mug on the floor in surprise. "Harry!" I threw the chair out from underneath me and ran up the stairs as Harry continued to scream – "SIRIUS, NO! NO!" I burst through our bedroom door and found Harry thrashing around in bed, his face covered in sweat, and his eyes squeezed tight against the mental anguish of his dreams. "REMUS, LET GO OF ME! SIRIUS!"

"Harry, HARRY!" I sat down on the bed beside him and grabbed his shoulders, "Harry, it's just a dream, you're okay, Harry." His body slowed its motions and I moved my hands to his face and started rubbing his cheeks with my thumbs, "Come on, Harry, wake up." Harry finally lay completely still and his eyes, filled with tears, opened and found mine. I gasped, and pulled him to sitting and wrapped my arms around him. He began sobbing into my neck and I just continued to hold him, pat his back, and whisper reassurances whenever I thought of them.

"I was back at the Ministry… the night Sirius…" Harry's words were broken through his sobs and I pulled him tighter against me. There's really nothing you can say that will make this better. I can't tell him Sirius is in a better place, that everything is going to be alright… because we knew that it wasn't. We, both of us, were missing parts of our hearts… we'd had them ripped from our bodies by the cold, life-ruining hands of people who were evil to their very cores. We had seen things that no person should ever have to see, dealt with horrors that no one should ever know of… but we'd come through it together. And we were going to recover together. No matter how many sleepless nights, horrifying nightmares, and intensely painful memories that lurked in our minds, we were going to find our own way to be happy and to continue our lives. Together.

Some time later, Harry took a deep, steadying breath and pulled back to face me. I smiled a sad smile and reached up to wipe the tears off his cheeks and then my own before leaning over to kiss him softly. He reached up and tangled his fingers in my hair and rested his forehead against mine – "Thank you, Ginny." "It's nothing, Harry…" He shook his head, "No, Ginny, it's everything. Thank you." I smiled and planted another kiss on his lips before pulling him back into bed and, eventually, drifting off to sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

… **. Andddddd story two for today! Enjoy! [Smut ahead! ;)]**

 **Still not JKR. :(**

* * *

I could feel his eyes on me.

We were sitting in the Great Hall and eating breakfast. I was chatting with Hermione about my upcoming O.W.L.s but I could barely focus. My skin was burning under the heat of his gaze and I hadn't even looked up at him yet.

"I can give you my study schedule from last year," Hermione was saying as I looked up and finally met his eyes. _Oh Merlin._ "I think I still have it in my trunk from last year. I was holding onto it so I could model my N.E.W.T.S. schedule after it."

He was running his finger along the rim of his cup and his eyes were locked onto mine. I felt the skin on my cheeks flush an even deeper red and my breath caught in my throat. When I saw him slide his tongue out of his mouth just slightly and moisten his lips, I couldn't take it anymore. I stood up abruptly – "Ginny?" Hermione seemed startled at my sudden movement. "Oh," I stammered, quickly gathering my things, "sorry Hermione. I forgot I have… a project to do." I locked eyes with Harry and let my gaze dart quickly to the door. He smiled in understanding, "I have to run down to the lake and do some… collecting for Herbology." I slung my bag over my shoulder and did all I could to keep from sprinting to the door.

I walked out into the Entrance Hall and towards the oak front doors – I was halfway down the lawn when I felt someone's hand slide around my waist and their lips on my neck. "Mmm… hey Seamus, I was hoping you'd join me." "Hey!" Harry's voice sounded from just behind me and I couldn't help the laugh that escaped my lips. "You wish I was Seamus, eh?" Harry grabbed my hips with both hands and turned me so I was facing him and backed me up against the nearest tree. "Well," I said, looking up at him, "Seamus really knows what he's doing with his hands _…_ " I winked at him and Harry let out a breathy laugh. "Well, I guess I'm just going to have to prove that I'm more… capable, yes?" I brought my finger up to my lips and pretended to think – "I suppose that would work…"

I smiled when Harry's mouth found mine and moaned when our hips met. I felt Harry's grin on my lips and I wrapped my arms around his neck to pull him even closer – I didn't want any space between us. His hands began to wander over my exposed skin, up my arms and the sides of my neck, before he moved his hands inside my robes. I groaned as Harry placed his hand on the small of my back and pulled me flush against him, sighed against his mouth as he slid his hand up under my shirt and moved his hands over the skin of my back. I felt like every inch of my body was on fire.

Harry moved his mouth to my neck and began trailing kisses along my pulse points and over my collarbones. "Harry…" My voice sounded breathy and a little desperate… but I didn't mind. Harry was driving me absolutely mad, and judging by the glint in his eyes, he knew it. He moved his hands to my stomach now and they made their tantalizingly slow ascent up towards my breasts. I arched my back and pressed my chest into his, "Harry, please…"

He smiled against my neck before moving his mouth back to mine and trailing his fingers over my breasts. I wound my fingers into his hair and moaned as Harry finally, _finally,_ tugged on my nipples. Electric shocks shot through my skin and it took all the self-control I had to keep from pushing Harry onto the ground and having my way with him. As it was, I slid down the tree until I was sitting on the ground and Harry was draped over me, his hands all over my skin.

Our kisses grew in intensity until Harry began tracing the hem of my skirt with his fingertips. "Ginny," he gasped, pulling his mouth away from mine, "I want to touch you... but we've never… so I wanted to ask…" I pulled his mouth back to mine, "Touch me, Harry." He immediately obliged.

His fingers hesitated for just a moment as he reached my knickers, but he seemed to muster his courage and _oh Merlin…_ He found my clit with surprising speed and I was thankful I was sitting down… my knees would have buckled with the pleasure coursing through my veins.

Harry slid his other hand down between my thighs and gently pushed one finger inside me… and I came apart. I felt my walls clamp down on Harry's hand and did my best to contain the loud moan threatening to escape. After a few moments, Harry ran his hands up my sides and kissed me softly, smiling against my lips. "Do you want me to…" Harry shook his head, "Well, I can't lie and say no," he said, laughing and nodding his head down towards his trousers. I smiled wryly at him, "But I think we've pushed our luck out here, yeah?" I nodded, "Probably."

Harry stood up and reached down to pull me to standing before wrapping his arm around my waist. "So, how did I stack up?" "Well, you're no Seamus, but you'll do." Harry gasped and I took off running. "You better run, Ginevra!" I laughed as I ran all the way back to the castle.

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 **Yes, I know, very short. But this is what came to me, so... (hahahahaha omg puns). Maybe the next time I see you we'll be talking about Jily?**


	4. Chapter 4

**Hello! It's been a while… and I'm hiding shamefully behind my keyboard as I type this. My life just went insane over the past few weeks (months?) and my brain has been completely blocked… things have** _ **started**_ **to ease up and this little story struck me. I was listening to a lot of John Mayer while I was writing it, so sorry if it's… weird male angsty or something. ;)**

 **I was also thinking about Jily last night, so I might have another chapter for that Drabble soon. Be on the look out! x**

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"Fuck."

I walked back into my office after leaving drinks with Minerva ( _bloody hell, I will never get used to that_ ) Horace, and Hagrid to find a giant stack of papers from my third and fifth years on my desk. "I knew I should have staggered these due dates more," I grumbled as I walked over to my desk and plopped down in my chair. I waved my wand to summon my quill and red marking ink. I was looking at another long night.

It had definitely given me pause when McGonagall had first written and asked me to teach. In the few short months since I've started teaching though, I found that I had really come to love it. Except the marking. The marking is total bollocks.

But I did love watching the students learn more and more over the course of the year, hearing them talk about defensive theory and practice in the halls outside of class. Sure, I still got some of the " _Bloody hell, Harry Potter is our teacher!"_ nonsense, but I usually just channeled my inner Dumbledore and interrupted their tittering – "It's Professor Potter, thanks."

I'd also nearly forgotten how much I loved Hogwarts. The crisp air that filled the halls and grounds around early October, the blazing fires that left the whole school smelling faintly of ash… the way the sun looked going down over the lake. I still can't believe I ever managed to leave this place.

I hadn't been back to Hogwarts since the year after the war… when we'd all gone back to celebrate Hermione's graduation. And hers.

I'd still been with her then. Still wrapped up in her rich brown eyes, her winning, daring smile, her long, glowing, fiery red hair. I can still remember the way her warm hand felt in mine, the way her eyes would sparkle when she pressed her hips against me, the way her dazzling, freckled skin looked as she spread herself out in front of me under our favorite beech tree that afternoon. We could have been seen by anyone, but she never cared – "Let them see," she'd whispered, nibbling on my neck and pulling me on top of her, "I need you." Only an idiot wouldn't have obliged.

But, like a lot of things in my life, our relationship fell apart and she disappeared.

I'd been living in Diagon Alley at the time, sharing a flat with Ron and George. George was still pretty raw from the war and we didn't want him to be alone. Ron and I were struggling through Auror training, busting our arses every day to get through it so that we could move out into the field and start capturing those Death Eaters that had managed to escape. Auror training usually took three years, but, as people who had fought in and survived the war, we were approved for an accelerated training course that only lasted a year. It had seemed like such a good idea when we'd started… but Ron and I were exhausted all the time and we rarely saw anyone else other than people from the Auror Office.

It took a toll on our relationship. We'd known that it would, going into it. We thought we'd talked about it enough, thought that we'd prepared for what our life would be like. But once she graduated and was picked up by the Harpies, she was on the road all the time… and suddenly we were never seeing each other. Her times in London never seemed to correspond with my time off, we were both exhausted all the time and, eventually, the owls stopped being sent. Ron and Hermione had worked out an intricate schedule (because of course, Hermione couldn't resist), but she and I couldn't seem to figure it out, and we floundered under the weight of our separation.

One night – 3rd August – she apparated into my room and startled me out of a dead sleep. "Merlin," I'd said, laughing, sitting up, and reaching for my glasses, "you should at least let me know you're coming! I was this close to cursing you." I slid my glasses onto my eyes and saw that her eyes were red-rimmed, that she had tears streaming down her face. I'd stood up instantly, intending to wrap her in my arms… when she placed her hand on my chest. "I can't do this anymore, Harry."

And with those six words, my entire universe fell apart.

I haven't spoken to or about her since that night… but I've thought about her every single second. It's been a year and a half.

I'd written back to McGonagall and made some excuse – I couldn't get time away from the Auror Office or some other bollocks. McGonagall… was McGonagall. She wrote back immediately after I'd sent my owl. _I've already spoken to Kingsley, Potter, and he assures me that the Office has since slowed down, and while he isn't happy about losing you, he thinks they can make the sacrifice. The Ministry will also hold your position should you decide that you'd like to return to the Auror Office after you are finished teaching at Hogwarts._

I was out of excuses.

It wasn't that I didn't want to teach. I'd loved running the DA meetings in fifth year, loved watching my mates learn how to fight and become better wizards. I just didn't know if I was ready to go back to the place where so much had changed. To the last place that she and I really made sense. To the place where we had lost so many, too many, of the people we loved.

 _I'll be there in September,_ I wrote back, _I'll ride the train._

The end of August rolled around and, finally, it was the first of September. I packed my trunk, like I had so many times before, and shut Marauder into his cage. He clicked his beak irritatedly at me and I smiled. He always reminded me of Hedwig when he did that.

I waved my wand and shrunk my trunk before walking over to the corner and grabbing a brown, shabby briefcase from beside my desk. I ran my thumb over the clasp before clicking the case open, and placing the trunk inside, next to the Marauders Map, my invisibility cloak, and the photo album of my parents. I'd added other pictures to that album since Hagrid had given it to me… Sirius, Remus, Tonks, Fred… they all smiled up at me from those pages now. She was also in there… I didn't have the heart to remove her.

The train was a rush of emotions. I'd walked to the back of the train and, without even thinking about it, settled myself in the last carriage against the window. My mind flooded with all the times I'd sat here with Ron and Hermione, the time I'd met Remus in this very carriage… I was sitting in his seat, carrying his case. I sighed and reached up to ruffle my hair before curling up in the corner, as Remus once had, and covered myself with my travelling cloak.

It took me a few days to adjust.

I sobbed alone in my office that first night, thinking back to all the times I'd talked to Remus inside these walls. I thought about Teddy and how horrible I felt that I was able to have such a close relationship with the father he would never get to know. I suppose this is how Remus and Sirius always felt about me.

I hadn't been back inside the castle since that night. I was almost surprised to find that all the walls were still standing, that there weren't bodies lining the floor inside the Great Hall. I'd slipped on my invisibility cloak on my third night back, mostly out of habit because, of course, I was free to go where I wished now, and wandered the halls. This had been one of my absolute favorite things to do while I'd been here at Hogwarts. There is just something…. different, more magical, about the school at night. Magical in the Muggle way, you know? Full of something that you can't quite put your finger on, but you have to stand in awe of anyway.

I'd noticed a plaque on the wall beside the Great Hall earlier that night – it was a remembrance plaque that listed all those who lost their lives here that night – and I decided to walk through and see if there were any others. And there were.

I found plaques for Remus and Tonks in the tower, for Fred in the hall (Flitwick had, most fittingly, also put the patch of swamp he'd saved underneath Fred's plaque). Before long, tears were streaming down my face and I walked through, reading the names of those lost and thinking of the times I'd shared with them during our years here together.

I've now been here for a few months, though, and my emotions have since settled down.

I finished marking the third year essays after what felt like ages and sighed – I waved my wand to stack them up and sent them over to the third year drawer in my cabinet. I closed my eyes and leaned back in my chair, tossing my legs up on the desk and letting myself relax before I started grading the fifth year essays. I asked for significantly more sophisticated essays and I needed to gather myself – some of those third year essays were… difficult to say the least. _How hard is it to write about hinkypunks for Merlin's sake? Honestly…_

"Harry?"

My eyes snapped open and I froze. _Bloody hell…_

She was here, standing in my office. Her gorgeous, flowery red hair was shoulder length now and it was sparkling in the light from the candles I had burning in my office. The flames were reflected in her chocolate eyes and the effect made it seem like they were on fire… _what…_

"What are you doing here?"

Anyone else would have let their head fall with shame, brushed hair out of their eyes uncomfortably – not her. She strode slowly towards my desk, her eyes raking over my face as she walked around and sat on top of my desk. I hadn't thought to move my chair back and we were now so close I could feel the heat radiating from her. I was desperate to touch her skin.

I watched her eyes trail over my body – they left my face and traced their way slowly, devastatingly slowly, over the lines of my chest and down my legs. I know she'd let her eyes linger around my… but I couldn't think about that without risking utter collapse.

I cleared my throat. "To what do I owe the pleasure of your visit tonight?" She laughed and the bright, rich laughter I love filled the air and throttled me – "Don't be so formal, Harry. Just because you're a professor now doesn't mean you need to channel your inner Dumbledore." Her eyes captured mine and she smiled warmly, "I just needed to see you."

I groaned, "We… we broke up over a year ago – " "A year and a half," she interrupted. I nodded, "So why are you here now?" "I…" for the first time since she walked in she looked marginally vulnerable, "I miss you, Harry. I… I still love you."

Her words hung in the air between us. "And?" I asked – I needed her to say more. To tell me what she wants. What she expects of me.

"I want you. I want you back. I…" she closed her eyes for a moment and took a deep breath. When she opened her eyes, they were blazing. "I made a mistake. I thought that breaking up with you would make the most difficult time of my life a little easier. I wouldn't have to worry about missing you when I was travelling everywhere for quidditch games, I wouldn't have to stress about never seeing you. I wouldn't have my mum asking when we were getting married and when we were going to start populating the earth with freckly, black haired babies… I wasn't ready for any of that yet and I think it just freaked me out."

"And I wasn't… I wasn't okay after the war. None of us were. I needed the time apart to come to terms with everything that had happened – that my brother was dead, that my mum and George will never be the same people again. That all of a sudden I was supposed to go out into the world and be an adult when I didn't even know how to deal with the things that were living in my own head. I was living on the edge of collapse every single day, Harry. And I think that breaking up with you forced me to stop clinging to someone that I knew would do his damnedest to protect me. I needed to be vulnerable. But I couldn't make you responsible for dealing with that. So I pushed you away and just buckled down and dealt with it all."

I trailed my eyes over her face and, eventually, my eyes found hers. "And did you?" She raised her eyebrow, "Deal with it." I clarified. She smiled a small smile at me – "Yes. And I know that that doesn't give me the right to just turn up here and demand your forgiveness or ask you to take me back – " "You're right, it doesn't." I stood up and pushed my chair into the wall and began pacing around the room. Her head dropped infinitesimally for a moment before she turned around on my desk with a determined look on her face.

I knew where this was going. We were going to fight.

"So what did you want me to do, Harry?" She jumped off the desk and her fiery red hair was swinging behind her – "Did you want me to just stay with you and keep struggling just to make you bloody happy? I needed TIME, Harry!" She was yelling now as she stormed over and stood in front of me, her hands on her hips.

"And you don't think that I would have liked to know that?!" I raked my fingers through my hair and glared down at her, "That all you needed to say was, 'Harry, I need some time to get myself together, to heal' and I would have let you!? You didn't need to break up with me, leave me completely devastated for _months_ with absolutely no clue as to what happened, what I'd done, or when I would ever see you again!"

"How did I know that you were going to let me go, Harry?! You and I both know that you have something of a hero complex – " "A hero complex?!" I yelled with laughter and she nodded aggressively – "Yes, Harry, yes. A. HERO. COMPLEX. And you can't deny – " "Please! If you had just taken a moment to _explain –" "You wouldn't have been happy about it, Harry, and you bloody know it!"_

"Of course I wouldn't have been happy! But I asked you, the summer after sixth year, for a break that I knew we needed because I couldn't be the person you needed me to be while I was looking for the Horcruxes. I _explained_ and we ended things and it was fine – " " _FINE?!_ Harry, I was devastated. I cried for _weeks_ – " "And how do you think I felt – " but she shouted over me – "I'M NOT SAYING THAT WHAT I DID WAS ALRIGHT." She stepped forward and grabbed the collar of my robes, "BUT I LOVE YOU HARRY. I LOVE YOU AND I NEED US TO WORK THIS OUT. I AM NOT GOING TO LET YOU PUSH ME AWAY. I AM GOING TO FIGHT FOR YOU, FOR US, UNTIL YOU TELL ME THERE IS NO CHANCE."

And there it was – that flowery smell that I always found so intoxicating, the feel of her fingers just brushing my neck, the way that her eyes were two bright, determined flames, and I did the only thing I could possibly do. I kissed her.

She wound her arms around my neck and pressed her body flush against mine. "Ginny…" I groaned against her mouth and I felt her smile against my lips. I wrapped my arms around her waist and walked us backward until she hit the desk. She broke away with a smirk, "What are you thinking of doing Professor Potter?" I laughed, "Oh, shut up," and pulled her mouth back to mine as I picked her up and placed her on the edge of the desk and stood between her thighs.

"Harry," she pulled away again, panting, and put her hands on my chest. "We have to talk about this." I smirked at her and leaned down to run my nose along the column of her neck – "What's to talk about? You love me… I love you…" She pressed her fingers gently into my chest and I moved back just enough to look into her eyes. "You do?"

I smiled, "Of course I do… Ginny, I never stopped loving you. I was just… crushed. Before you ended things, I…" I closed my eyes to gather myself and took a deep breath before meeting her gaze again. "I was going to ask you to marry me." "Oh, Harry, I – " "It's okay," I said, reaching up and winding my fingers into her hair, "you didn't know… I'd made Ron and Hermione swear that they wouldn't tell you." Ginny gasped, "So THAT'S why Hermione kept sending me all these frantic letters to ask why we'd broken up!" I nodded. "After you ended things, I basically just stopped talking about you. It took Hermione a little time to adjust, so I guess she just channeled her energy towards harassing you." I laughed and Ginny rolled her eyes, "If she isn't harassing someone, she just isn't happy!" "But that's why I was so devastated," I said, and I let my eyes trail over her face while she gathered her thoughts.

"It isn't okay, though, Harry. I… I really hurt you." "We hurt each other. It wasn't easy for you when I left to go on that Horcrux hunt… even less so because I couldn't tell you a damn thing. So… we're even." I smirked and she sighed, "I suppose… but do you trust me now? Do you believe me when I say that I'm done running?" I gazed into her eyes and felt my chest swell with feeling, "Yes. Do _you_ believe me?" She smiled and nodded, "Yes." I smiled and leaned down to kiss her neck again, relishing the taste of her skin and the smell of her hair. She sighed and let herself get lost for just a moment before – "But this is a huge thing to recover from, Harry, we can't just pick up where we left off and expect everything to be okay."

I didn't move away from her skin, but whispered my response into neck, "I know… we'll figure it out. We'll spend days talking about it. But right now," I tightened my fingers on her hips and pressed myself against her, "I need you, Ginny." Her hands found my face and pulled my mouth to hers.

We kissed slowly, deeply – the air around us buzzed with anticipation and need, but I needed to take it slow… I needed to feel and taste her everywhere… and I was in no hurry.

Essays long forgotten, I wrapped my hands under her bum and lifted her so that I could move her upstairs. She gasped as she left the desk and smiled against my mouth as she wrapped her legs around my waist and ground ever so slightly down onto my increasingly painful hard on. I pulled my mouth away from hers to open the door to my living quarters, and she moved her lips to my neck, kissing a tantalizing trail down towards my chest.

I climbed the stairs as quickly as I could without falling and killing us both… I wasn't going to survive Voldemort only to die in a sex-related accident in my first year teaching at Hogwarts. I would forever be the laughing stock of the wizarding world. And I think Ron would die just to kick my arse for killing his sister.

I walked over to the bed and tossed her gently down onto the blankets. She let out her bright, rich laugh as she moved her flaming hair from over her eyes and crawled backwards towards the pillow. I could feel the hunger in my stare as I looked down at her and felt all my blood rush towards my waist as I took in the blush in her cheeks. I sank down onto my hands and knees overtop of her and began slowly crawling my way up, kissing her periodically as I went. Her ankle, her knees, the inside of her thighs… I trailed my finger over the front of her trousers ever so lightly and couldn't keep the smile off my face when her hips jumped towards me. "Patience, Gin…" I said, moving my hand and wrapping my fingers around her hip and I moved to kiss her stomach where her shirt had ridden up.

Her hands flew down to the waistband of her trousers and she started fumbling with the button. I laughed lightly and reached over to still her hands, "Let me." I unbuttoned her trousers and slowly slid them off her legs, kissing her bare skin as I went. I tossed her trousers behind us on the floor and settled myself between her legs and looked up to catch her eyes – "Well, this is certainly a sight I've missed." She laughed breathlessly, "Come up here, Harry, you're killing me." I smiled and leaned forward until my mouth was centimetres from her knickers, "Patience…" I let my warm breath waft over her and couldn't suppress my smile when she groaned and closed her eyes.

I moved my hands up and grasp the waistband of her knickers, and I slid them down her legs before throwing them behind us too. And _oh my god_ how did I ever survive without this? I leaned down and took her into my mouth and _Merlin_ she was just as amazing as I remembered – she groaned and wound her fingers into my hair and held me against her, her voice filling the air around us as I flicked my tongue slowly against her. After a few minutes, or hours… who could really tell, I slid my hands up her sides and slowly pulled her shirt up and over her head. She sat up and smirked at me. "This is hardly fair, Harry." I smiled and stood up and her hands flew out to unbutton my trousers while I let robes fall to the ground behind me. Once I'd kicked my trousers off, she pulled me back down onto the bed and climbed on top of my lap. She reached her hands down between us and slid my shirt up and over my head before wrapping her arms around my neck and kissing me again. Our kisses were a little more frantic now – the absence of clothes seemed to introduce an urgency to the scene that made my desire for her almost painful.

"Where's your…" she pulled away and started looking around on the floor and feeling in the sheets, "Wand…" I finished, feeling (stupidly) around myself for it before falling out of bed and rummaging around in my robes. "Here!" I held it up like I'd just discovered something miraculous and she laughed before falling back onto the pillows and smiling at me. "Well, come on then." I didn't need to be asked twice.

I settled between her legs and leaned down to kiss her again, before pulling away and waving my wand over her abdomen. Satisfied with my work, I tossed my wand onto my bedside cabinet and wrapped my hands into her hair and kissing her again. She, of course, had other plans. She wrapped her legs around my back and pulled me against her and moaned, "Harry, I need you inside me…"

Only an idiot wouldn't have obliged.

Afterwards, I collapsed beside her, wiping the sweat from my forehead before leaning over to kiss her softly before nestling my face into her neck and just breathing her in. We laid quietly for a while, her fingers tracing little designs onto my side before she spoke – "Harry?"

"Mmhm?" I nuzzled my nose into her neck and she chuckled, "Harry, I have something to ask you." "Hmm?" she sighed, "It's important, Harry." I groaned and pulled back so that I could look at her.

Her eyes had that look in them – that determined look that usually suggested some kind of mischief or, "Harry… will you marry me?"

I rolled over onto my arm and propped myself up so I could see her more clearly – "I thought you wanted to talk about this." She blushed, "It's like you said… what's there to talk about? We love each other and… well, we both know we're going to end up here anyway, so I'm just skipping a couple of steps." I grinned, "We're going to end up here anyway?" She nodded, "I meant it when I said that I love you Harry. I'm serious when I say that I'm done running. No matter what, you're stuck with me now. We'll figure it out, no matter what our lives look like. I could travel the world playing quidditch but I'll always want to come home to you. I don't care how little I get to see you with our jobs… I just want to know that, when we are both finally at home, that we're at home together. That we're building a life together even if we aren't physically in the same place." I raised my eyes to hers and grinned – they were as solid and determined as I've ever seen them. "Yes." She blinked, so I clarified, "Yes, I'll marry you."

The grin that lit up her face was absolutely electric. She shrieked and jumped on top of me, planted her mouth on mine… and I knew that we wouldn't get to sleep for at least a few more hours.


	5. Chapter 5

**Hello! It's been awhile since I've been here with a Harry/Ginny story...**

 **I was cleaning my flat today and this little number just popped into my head and wouldn't stop writing itself in my brain until I sat down at my computer and let it out. I'm not going to say that I cried while writing this... but I might have. You don't have to cry while reading it, you probably won't, but I cried writing it. I feel like whenever I'm writing Harry, I'm always thinking about loss and trauma and how you move past those things... I don't know. So anyway, I cried. Don't tell anyone.**

 **Disclaimer: I'm not JKR. Maybe she'll be my friend, though?**

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I'm looking down at the little baby in my arms and I don't even know where to begin.

She's amazing, Ginny is. She… she did _this._ She gave us _this._ She is… the strongest, most beautiful person I know. I'm torn between staring at her and staring at him. I can't believe that I get to have this… I get to live the rest of my life with…

"He's got your hair." I look up, surprised to hear her voice and Ginny is smiling at me with the widest grin I've ever seen on her face. She'd been sleeping, or at least I thought she had been, a moment ago, but her chocolate eyes are burning into mine now, the happiness just radiating out of her. I walk over to her bed and she scoots over, patting the spot beside her. I climb in carefully, balancing the baby, _our son,_ in my arms. I'm terrified that I'm going to drop him.

"It's okay, Harry," Ginny says softly, noticing the stiffness in my body and the terror that I'm sure is written all over my face, "You can't hurt him," she chuckles, "Mum always said that babies bounce." "But look at him, Gin. He's so… he's so small and the littlest thing could hurt him and I can't… I can't." Ginny smiles sadly at me and wiggles her arm between my back and her bed, picking up my arm and wrapping it around her shoulders. I stiffen, but Ginny just lays her head on the side of my chest, "You can hold him with one hand, Harry. He weighs seven pounds." "What if I drop him?" "You won't drop him." "How do you know?!" My anxiety coats every word and Ginny turns a bit to look at me, "Because I know you, Harry. You won't. You would throw yourself in front of one of those Muggle trains before you let anything happen to him. And look at you…" she smiles warmly at me, "you're a natural." "I don't feel like a natural," I say, shifting him in my arm, "I have no idea what I'm doing." "Neither of us do," Ginny says, laughing, "parenting is basically just making it up as you go along and hoping that he doesn't set our house on fire by accident." "But at least you've seen this done properly before," I mumble and Ginny freezes for just an instant before her expression changes. It's that fierce, determined, loving expression that I've seen on her face so many times… it's one of the many, many reasons I fell in love with her. She wriggles her arm back out from behind me and shifts on the bed, taking my face in her small hands – "Harry… you are going to be a brilliant father." "I don't even know how to be a father," I feel the tears welling in my eyes and though I want to look away, I know that Ginny will just pull my head back up and make me look at her. "Oh, Harry," she reaches out and lifts him from my arm and I almost protest, but then she lays him on my chest, his little head nestled under my chin. My hands move instinctively to hold him there, to form a protective layer between his tiny body and the world, and Ginny smiles a heartbreakingly beautiful smile, "That, right there," she says, reaching up and tangling her fingers in my hair, "That's how I know." "That's just… that's nothing," I say, "I don't know how to change a nappy or feed him or make him stop crying or… or anything. Gin, I'm going to be rubbish at this!"

She just smiles, "You can learn all those things… but what he needs most from you is _love,_ Harry. That's it. And you, Harry Potter, are one of the most loving, caring men I know." I feel my cheeks go red and her smile brightens, "Besides, do you think I would let you hold him if I thought you were going to hurt him? You saw what I had to go through to bring him into this world." She laughs and I join her, until I feel him start wiggling against my chest and making little sounds. I reach down and move him into my arms again so I can look at him. He really is one of the most beautiful things I've ever seen, and then I look up at Ginny and I feel like my face is going to break with the smile that forms on my lips, "You're right, he does look like me," Ginny laughs, "Harry, he could be your twin!" I reach down gingerly at trace the little wrinkles on his forehead, "No lightening scars for you, mate. Your mum and I are going to protect you… I promise." I lean down and press a little kiss on his nose and he grunts, moving his hand up and feeling my cheek. Tears have welled up in my eyes again and I wipe at them hastily to avoid having one drip on his face. I hear Ginny sniff and I look up – her eyes, too, are filled with tears. "Harry…" I move him back into one arm and hold my other arm out for her, shifting our son onto my side so that Ginny can lay on my chest (it's her favourite way to lay and, honestly, mine too). His eyes are dark blue now, but I find myself hoping that they become chocolate brown like hers. "We will protect him," she says, wiping her eyes and I lean over and press a kiss to her forehead, "but you have to remember that he's safe, Harry. He doesn't live in the world we used to live in. He doesn't have to think about what we used to think about every day. This is a different world…" I nod, my chin moving against the top of her head and we sit in silence for a while - our son drifts back to sleep in my arms while we both watch him, Ginny traces patterns on my chest with her index finger, and I rub my thumb across her shoulder blades.

"What do you think they'd say," I whisper after a while, "if they were here?" She doesn't need to ask whom I'm talking about; I can tell she already knows. "Harry, they would be… they would be over the moon. All of them." I smile at her addition – I'd just meant my parents, but she knew I would have been wondering about… everyone. "Your mum and dad," Ginny continues, "would be so proud… your mum would probably be crying with my mum and fussing over him… probably trying to flatten down his hair already," she cracks a smile at me, "your dad would be messing about with Remus, Sirius, and you… probably talking about how another handsome Potter had just made his grand entrance into the world. Sirius would also definitely make a joke about how the Potters seem to have a soft spot for redheads." I chuckle quietly, not wanting to wake him, and press a kiss to her forehead, "Fred would be out in the corridor with George putting together a list of all the horrible tricks and Wheezes products he'd be getting for his birthday every year," I say and Ginny laughs, her chest rumbling against mine, "Dear Merlin, they would. They would have made it their mission to torture us as much as humanly possible." "My dad and Remus would probably have all kinds of advice…" I say, trying to keep the sadness out of my voice. Ginny turns and smiles at me, "They would… but I know they had faith in you, Harry. Your dad… your dad loved you more than anything else in this world. So did your mum. And Remus… Merlin, Harry, Remus made you Teddy's godfather. And look how wonderfully you've done…" I sigh, "Godfather isn't the same," "Harry, did you care that Sirius was 'just' your godfather? Once you knew he was your godfather… Harry, it made all the difference for you. Don't you think Teddy feels the same, even though he knows you aren't his father? He practically lives with us for Merlin's sake. You go to all his little quidditch matches, you practice with him in the garden for _hours,_ you drop everything whenever he needs you to… Harry, you're giving him everything that I know Sirius would have _loved_ to be able to give you. You're letting him know that he's loved, that someone cares about him…"

The tears are falling uncontrollably down my face now, so I just turn and bury my face in her hair. "Oh Harry," I pull the baby up, placing him on my chest, and she wraps her arms around both of us, peppering kisses across my jaw and I try to stifle the sobs that are working their way out of me, "I just never, _never_ want either of them to feel what I did growing up," I say as she wipes tears off my cheeks, "I felt _so alone_ all the time and like everything I did was wrong… I didn't feel like anyone loved me for _years…_ and sometimes I feel like I'm just going to wake up and be in that bloody cupboard again and all of this will have been a dream." "Harry…" she leans forward and presses a kiss to my lips, "Harry, I _love_ you. Teddy loves you… our son loves you. We will never, ever stop loving you…" "I love you, Gin, Merlin I love you," I move carefully, trying not to disturb him, and cup her cheek and pull her mouth to mine. Our kiss is brief, tender, but it fills me, reassures me. Ginny is real. Our son is real. This is real.

She buries her face in my neck and I sigh into her hair, "You are the most amazing person on Earth, Ginny." I can feel her smile against my skin, "Don't waste my time telling me things I already know, Harry." My laughter rumbles through my chest, shaking against her and the baby until she's laughing too. Somehow, he doesn't wake up this time. Ginny smiles when I point this out, "He better get used to it," she says, planting a kiss to the base of my neck, "there's a lot of laughter in our house." I chuckle, "That's true," I say, and I realise how different that is, already, from the house that I grew up in. The Dursley's were cold, prim, stiff… it was the Weasleys that showed me how happy a house could actually be. I have a feeling that, if my parents had survived, our house would have been a lot like the Weasleys. "I'm glad we have a house full of laughter," I say, pressing a kiss to her hair, "Me too," she replies, reaching over and placing her hand on top of mine on our son's back. I smile down at her and intertwine our fingers, and we sit in silence again, just watching him sleep.

"We should call him James," she says later as she runs her fingers gently through the dark mass of hair on his head. I look down at her, "You think?" She nods, a smile beginning to form on her lips, "I think he looks like a James. How about… James Sirius Potter?" Tears fall from my eyes again as I pull her against me, "I… yes… I think that's perfect." She kisses the underside of my jaw and reaches up to run her fingers through his hair again. "Poor McGonagall," Ginny says after a few minutes, "she's not going to know what to do with herself when this one gets to Hogwarts." I laugh, the tears making the sound stranger than usual, and she smiles at me as she sits up, wiping them off my face. "Thank you," I say, the words barely making their way out of my mouth. She smiles and kisses me, "Harry, they are so proud of you. I know it." My mind goes back to the forest and I know she can tell by the look on her face, "They are a part of you," she smiles sadly as she repeats Sirius' words, tangling her fingers in my hair, "they love you so, so much. And I know how proud they all are of everything that you've accomplished, of the family that you've created," "That _we've_ created," I correct her, smiling warmly and wrapping my arm tighter around her waist, "I couldn't do any of this without you. You are… Ginny, you are _everything_." Her smile then nearly stopped my heart.

"James Sirius Potter?" she asks, cocking her eyebrow at the baby on my chest. I nod, "James Sirius Potter."

* * *

 **Until next time xx**


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